The Unofficial Harry Potter Cookbook and Cooking through My Grief

Taking it one recipe at a time. 2013 will be mainly focused on "The Unofficial Harry Potter Cookbook," by Dinah Bucholz, and how doing what I love, cooking, being with my family and reading Harry Potter will help me process my grief associated with loosing my 3 week old daughter, Ruby, on November 18th, 2011.
Join me for a "culinary magical masterpiece" throughout 2013!

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

My Heartbreaking Memoir

Unfortunatly sometimes life throws you a curve ball, one or in our case two of them that are totally unexpected! So, I guess I will start with Rose...as mentioned in an earlier post on here she was diagnosed with precocious puberty earlier this year. We went ahead and had a surgery done on her earlier this month to help prevent any further issues and to regress her already present physical changes. We thought everything was good and great until a week ago when she started bleeding again. I assumed it was normal, but called her endocrynologist just to give him the heads up. He called me a few days later a little concerned that something else was going on and so he scheduled another hospital visit for an ultra sound and lab work. He also set up another visit with a Ped. OB, thinking that perhaps we addressed the wrong issue and that something really is going on with her ovarys. So, yesterday my Mother, Rose and I (Brian is in Russia for a trip for his MBA this week) went back to the hospital for these tests to be done. Rose had a great experience this time and the nurses that worked with her were excellent! We have our appointment on Thurs. with her OB and we will get the results then, except for that her endo called me today with not so great news from the reading on Rose's ultrasound. He said the the ultra sound doc found that where her left ovary should be there is a 4 cm tumor that the ob will be talking with me about on thurs...this also means surgery in the very near future, again, to get it taken out. We are praying that it is not cancerous. Just today Rosie started complaining about her left side hurting...I was going to wait to post anything about this but I figure we need prayers right now for us that Rosie will be able to be healed and that all of her doctors will be able to figure out everything that may be going on that shouldn't be in her body, and that they will know how to fix it! So, I thank you for your prayers for us right now!
As for curve ball #2 last thursday I went to a maternal fetal care office in the hospital because they said I may be having a baby with down syndrome and they wanted to investigate further. It turns out that I have a 1 in 6 % chance. Which after that office visit I am still not sure if the baby is downsyndrome or not because we didn't do an amniocentesis, but the specialist doctor thinks that something may be wrong with the baby's heart development and Iwill be going back in 3 weeks for a check-up. I went to my OB today and she was concerned about what the specialist had told her. Luckily the heart condition is fixable but it will be a long road. I will have to deliver downtown instead of at the hospital I was wanting to deliver at. The hospital down town is connected to the childrens hospital were the baby would be in the NICU and where pedo heart surgeons are readily available. Of course all of this is somewhat of a scientific guess right now because the baby's heart is so tiny the doctor couldn't get a great look at it. We will know for sure by the time I am 22 weeks along, until then I hold my breath! There is the optimistic approach that I am trying to take where I just believe that everything is ok with my baby and that it will be born healthy and strong on the due date...
So, this is my heartbreak right now. I will keep you updated on what is going on with Rose when I know more and also with the baby in my belly. I guess right now I just ask for prayers so we can be strong enough to handle all of this stress and worry that is now on my shoulders and on my husbands!!!

7 comments:

  1. Oh Amber thank you for posting this because I want to know what is going on, I actually thought of Rosie the other and wondered if anything happened after the surgery!! I'm glad she didn't have a traumitizing time at the doctor this time!! Please call me when you can after you find out more about Rosie!! She is in my every though and prayer!!! So are you and the baby!!!

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  2. You are in our prayers as well. I'm so great-full you have good doctors for both you and Rose.

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  3. Oh Amber, I am so sorry that you are having to carry such a heavy burden right now. My prayers are with you, Rose, the baby and Brian.

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  4. Amber, I know I don't know you as well, but Brian was such a dear friend when we were growing up, so since you are his wife, I care about you too! I am so sorry for all of the stress you & Brian are under right now. I pray that Rose will be able to have the issues she is having fixed & have no further problems. I also pray that the baby you are carrying is healthy & that you don't go crazy waiting for your 22 week ultrasound to find out more. Heavenly Father obviously knows that you & Brian are a strong couple to be able to handle all that is going on. I'm sure that you've thought to have Brian give Rosie a blessing before surgery, but I bet a blessing for you & Brian would be helpful, too. I'll be praying for your family :)

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  5. Amber we have your family in our thoughts prayers. please let me know if i can do anything.

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  6. Amber, like Laura, Brian was a very close friend of mine for many years and it breaks my heart that you guys have to go through this. You guys are in my thoughts and prayers!

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  7. Thank you soooooo much for your kind words and thoughts and prayers for us!!! You have no idea how much it truly means to us right now!!! Its wonderful to have so many friends supporting us right now! We truly are blessed! We have an appointment with the surgeon tomorrow morning and should be going in for surgery on Tues. I will be sure to let you all know how it is going!

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